For wives in a hard season
You still love him. You’re just tired of feeling alone in your own marriage.
Practical, judgment-free help for the hardest season of a marriage, whether you’re both trying or it feels like you’re the only one who still is.
What sounds like you right now?
Pick the one that’s closest. Each guide starts where you are and gives you a first step for this week.
If you’re ever afraid of him, please skip the articles for now. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is free and confidential, 24/7: call 1-800-799-7233 or text START to 88788.
Not sure where to start?
Start with ten minutes a day.
The free 14-Day Reconnect Plan gives you one small action a day, with the exact words to say. Every day is something you can start on your own, even if he isn’t on board yet.
- A two-minute check to see where you are
- Week one: small warmth, no big talks
- Week two: one honest conversation, scripted
A note before you start
If you’re here, something hurts. Maybe it’s a fight that won’t heal, or a quiet that has lasted too long, or a word you never thought he’d say.
You don’t have to fix the whole marriage tonight. Find the one thing above that sounds most like you, read it, and try the first small step. Things usually start to change with small, steady moves, not one big conversation.
Claire
Claire Hartwell writes Conquering Marriage for wives who want a warmer, closer marriage without losing themselves. The guides draw on current relationship research and name their sources. They aren’t therapy. More about how they’re written →
All the guides
Everything on the site, grouped by where you are.
If it feels like it’s ending
- Is My Marriage Over?
A hard season or the end - Signs of a Failing Marriage
Which ones are serious - How to Save Your Marriage
Six moves, in order - How to Stop a Divorce
When he wants out and you don’t - How to Fix a Broken Marriage
After a betrayal or a long cold war
If you feel like strangers
- How to Reconnect With Your Husband
When you feel like strangers - The 14-Day Reconnect Plan (free)
Ten minutes a day - How to Heal After a Fight
The first 48 hours - When You’re Not Happy in Your Marriage
Before you decide anything
For the hard seasons of being a wife
- How to Be a Better Wife
Without turning yourself inside out - How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids
What the resentment is made of
Newest guides
- How to Heal a Relationship After a Fight: The First 48 Hours, in Order (and What to Say)
- How to Be a Better Wife (Without Turning Yourself Inside Out)
- How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids (What the Resentment Is Made Of, and What to Do First)
- What to Do When You’re Not Happy in Your Marriage (Before You Decide Anything)
Browse every guide by topic
General marriage advice →
Saving a marriage, divorce, fights, and feeling unhappy.
Tips for wives →
Reconnecting with your husband, and the hard seasons of being a wife.
Get the free 14-Day Reconnect Plan
One ten-minute action a day, with the exact words to say. Every day is something you can start on your own.